Unfortunately for this post, there are no photos to accompany it. I've lost my camera and have turned my apartment upside down in search of it but with no reward, but hopefully soon my luck will change. This is just an update to my life thus far in France, I suppose, so I can't promise you much excitement but I can at least give you something to read. Every day is a change of emotions for me- some of the days I feel myself settling in and being happy and feeling as if I'm at home, like yesterday for example. We wanted to have Subway for dinner since they, like many institutions in France and the European Union, have student prices or discounts. Not exactly a "French" choice but when you are low on funds you can't exactly go out to eat for a delicious 10.50 euro "Saladier Lyonnais" every day. So we stood in line, gave our orders, and specified that they were "à emporter" which is the French version of "to go." Of course Subway is a good test of your French language skills because you don't just order one thing off of the menu and wait- you have to indicate which kind of bread that you would like, what size, that you would like the "ménu étudiant" (student combo), and then correct them when they accidentally over-charge you. So I felt accomplished when I left the line with exactly what I had wanted when I entered it, and the exact price I had assumed. We walked back to the metro without even paying attention to where we were going because these acts are now so ingrained in our daily activities- it isn't even an actual thought process to figure out which direction to go now. Almost everything is instinct. And so yesterday evening I found myself wondering at the fact that possibly I could be happy here. As of right now it isn't my first choice, or even my second, but I still could make a life here if I must.
And then there are the other days, and I can't honestly figure out which is the most common of the two choices to be honest. It distresses me, because I can't actually remember having to work hard to be happy somewhere. But sometimes for my in Lyon that is the case. Most of the time it occurs when someone in an office somewhere has failed my American image of what a good business should be and how they should operate. During the second month, in particular, of my stay in Lyon, this was a huge problem. Frustration would overcome my entire being and my day would be ruined as I only saw the negative in all situations and wondered why in the world things can't be done "the better way." It was always a shock to me, during that second month (because the first month- or most of it anyway I stayed with a friend and her family and they helped me deal with things, but then for the second month I was on my own to face the world) how it seemed that people just didn't care about good business, which is a principle on which America operates.
Now, I'm coming to the end of the third month and the beginning of the fourth month in Lyon and I accept these things, not with resignation yet, but without surprise, that much is sure. Still there is frustration, but it's almost like it's wearing me down because I know that sometimes that's just how things are here. A friend recently explained it to me the best way I've heard so far: most of the jobs are government jobs, and in those jobs it's extremely difficult to get fired so there's not a lot of thoughts of working hard so that people keep their jobs- they're automatically safe. It's good for the employee but not for the general population when the employee doesn't care about doing their best since they don't really have to. It's the same with the university- for French students (unlike in America!) it's very cheap to go to University, so again the faculty is employed by the government and not extremely motivated to do an excellent job.
So at least I have an explanation and I'm not wandering around thinking "why why whyyyy!" anymore. And it's only certain times that these things happen, but it's always for very big issues, such as my "Carte de Sejour" which is my permit to live in France!
Life is in fact becoming more like home here though, and I am noticing it more every day. I'm looking forward to getting all the paperwork out of the way once and for all so that I can just enjoy the second semester with my new friends and travel as much as possible. Now that I know how the system works for choosing classes I expect next semester to go much smoother.
And it is now the week of Thanksgiving in America. I've never been away from home for a holiday, much less Thanksgiving! It's difficult for me because I'm also not in America at all, which means it's just another ordinary day for France and I (along with the other Americans scattered around) will be the one thinking of my family back home with their giant Thanksgiving feast and Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and Football game and Christmas music. I'll be the one sleeping in on Friday while America hustles and bustles during Black Friday. I can't imagine not participating in those events, but this is one of the sacrifices I have to make in order to further my education and open as many doors for myself (figuratively speaking) as possible. So I am ridiculously ecstatic that I'm going home for Christmas for a few weeks, but I am very sad to be missing Thanksgiving.
However, my awesome friends here are coming together for a Thanksgiving feast of sorts of our own and for that I'm so grateful. I'd rather be around friends than be on my own for sure on that day. We will attempt to put together a Thanksgiving meal in Lyon! The country representations are (other than me- the lone American) Sri Lanka, Mexico, Italy, Canada, and the Netherlands. Such an international way to celebrate the American holiday! But I'm very excited and hopefully I will find my camera before then and be able to document the day in pictures as well as words for all to see!
So until the Thanksgiving post- à bien tôt!
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